Friday, May 13, 2005

You can't please 'em all

Recently the Diver’s Arms suffered “Mr. Tosser”, a problem diner, 2 nights in a row. This man is impossible to please.

In an attempt to deflect any possible criticisms from the diner, the Bistro manager gave undivided personal attention to Mr Tosser's table.

University educated, in a high powered government job as regional director with the health department, mixing with the cream of the up & coming public service, one would expect Mr. Tosser to have some manners & be able to conduct himself in a social setting. (Haha...)

However nothing pleased Mr Tosser, (as usual). The drinks were "too long coming", meals were "off", were "cold", & were "not what we ordered" etc etc.

Each & every complaint was delivered in a most unreasonable, brusque & rude manner.
Before long we had:
Refunded all payments made for drinks
Bought a further round of drinks
Replaced all meals
Refunded all monies paid for meals
Still Mr Tosser demanded that we satisfy him.

The Bistro manager explained:"I am sorry Mr Tosser, we have given you everything free & replaced everything. At this point there is absolutely nothing more we can do for you. We have done all that we can."

Glaring at all of us, Mr Tosser departed with his entourage, but without the emotional victory for which he had been hoping.

Later, on a day off, the Bistro Manager of the Diver's Arms, stopped for a cold one at the Bosun’s Tavern.

"Right you *redacted bad word*, now we are going to smash you for what you did to me the other night!"

The Bistro Manager turns at these words & sees Mr Tosser, accompanied by a half dozen or so brawny types, his cousins.

1 comment:

catupiry said...

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I just read latest one. As you know I decided to learn English with your blog, I hit a lot of unknown words. But at least I could understand you had viscious customer... Did I get it right?