Wednesday, July 23, 2008

$1 a pop, extra for snarkiness!

As an upright member of society, Mine Host takes quiet umbrage at slants on his honesty and responsibility.

An example: the "roadside breath test".
An offence without a victim.
An offence with an arbitrary demarcation between virgin innocent and guilty as sin;
that demarcation is a blood alcohol content of .05%
and previously was .08%
and in parts of the developed world is .01%

An offence of which one is guilty of being impaired, but it not being possible to drink oneself into a state where your reflexes would deteriorate to the point that they would match those of elderly & inept drivers who freely tootle past during your arrest.

An offence where one must prove one is innocent, rather than the state having to prove one is guilty.
An offence where declining to prove your innocence automatically results in being guilty, and being publicly besmirched as guilty.

Notwithstanding that, Mine Host complies readily with the procedure.

Mine Host carries silently his umbrage at the indignity of the procedure and the automatic slight on his probity. This is a feeling shared by many/most of the population.

Mine Host is however, in a postion to assauge his umbrage.

Every time he is asked to provide a breath specimen, he will at his place of business, subsequently add a random extra $1 to the bill when a police officer buys a round.

Wickedly, when being breath tested, Mine Host often asks if the testing officer would like to "get a second sample".

1 comment:

Youie said...

Only $1 for a whole round, Steve? Surely $1 per drink would be both more equitable and more satisfying..?