Dancing in the Street

A very quiet Saturday night. They happen sometimes.

There is a three-piece band playing, $2000 fee and nobody to hear it. A handful may drift in later on. The night won't cover bar wages. Never mind the band fee.

The band leader asks do they really have to persist with this charade?

......Only if they want to collect the fee.

He absorbs this, isn't happy, but grudgingly will keep playing.

Their music is on the "heavy" side of "pub rock". Probably a bit too heavy for this town, it'd only work if the pub was already crowded.

The two guitarists are wearing transmitter packs, to avoid being tangled in wires. These packs are on their back, transmitting to the amplifiers. This means they don't have to stand on the one spot.

So: In joker mode, being as they've argued with me about continuing to play, and there are no customers, they walk all around the bar all the while playing, the sound continues to blare from the stage.

This takes some getting used to, as all one's conditioning is that music eminates from the point where it is played. One's trained instincts are suddenly wrong, this is difficult to cope with.

Being a Saturday night the street is deviod of traffic. There is barely a car going down the street every half hour or so.

I suggest we move into the street, for a change of scenery.

The drummer has to remain at his post, but the guitarists, the barmaid & I move accross the street to the median strip.

The band keeps playing, which is quite surreal. There is only a slight plinking noise from the guitars in the street, and the music continues to blare from the amplifiers in the pub.

All four of us dance (well, shake a little) to the music, then drift back inside.

Several more times over the next few hours we repeat the exercise. The guitarists find it great fun, & stand in a lane of traffic each & play, like wild men of rock or something!

(There is no traffic, being a Saturday night)

Live Bands

A live band, playing in a pub.
A most risky tactic for the pub.

It is a gamble: That you will have increased custom to pay for the band, and then some.
It is a one-off gamble. That is, there is no residual effect, as there would be from say new furniture. You are paying a lot for live music, and can only use that music while it hangs in the air. As soon as it is gone, so is any benefit.
Tomorrow night, or next week, you'll have to think up something new all over again (perhaps a different band - but who knows how it'll turn out?)

Most likely it will pan out so:
First off you will require smelling salts. This will be of invaluable assistance for coping when you learn the band's fee.
The band will have a list of demands for extras on top of the stiff fee (no band plays for less than $1000 per night, booked for a minimum of two nights. Well, last time I used one anyway)
(a) They will want "free drinks all night" for the band & also for their groupies. Answer: NO
(b) They will want overnight accommodation for all the band. You don't have much choice in this. Usually they'll sleep almost anywhere, however if you don't have space you'll have to use motel rooms, and that gets expensive!
(c) They will want free meals for all band members.

At gig time the band will start off with dirges, that steadily empty the pub. People will slowly stream out.

The band will knock off for regular breaks of up to 3/4 of an hour. During this time the pub will continue to empty.

If you are lucky, or have made an astute choice of band, they will be playing the sort of music that "works" in your pub.

By the end of the gig the band will have warmed up and be playing livlier stuff, that had they played this to start with, the pub would now be full of people.

With very few exceptions this is how your live band experience will be.

It mostly won't be worth the effort.

Your Blessing is Requested!

"The Splintered Shingle" were a musical duo (Rusty & Jenna) who played the Wayside Tavern from time to time. Rusty was a big, lean, rawboned type, Jenna a petite & worldly blonde.

.... In the middle of a song, one of the patrons staggers forward to speak with Rusty. This often happens, someone will ask one or the other muso do they know this or that song, or somesuch.

This request is different:

"Mate, is it okay if I root your missus?" The bloke doesn't even seem all that drunk. He'd have to be though, or suicidal, to rile up such a rough looking bloke as Rusty, who'd be three times his size.

The look on Rusty's face was priceless.

His instinct is to reflexively drop this feller with a straight right.

Rusty stares down at all the gear around him, looks back up at the... er.. hopeful suitor, looks back down, you can practically see what he is thinking: "This is a $2,000 guitar I've got strapped to me, I can't just throw it down & belt this joker into next week...."

While Rusty ponders his dilemma, the hopeful suitor loses interest in the deal & wanders away, disappearing into the crowd.

For the remainder of the night, in the break between each set, Rusty runs a thoughtful & very careful eye over the crowd.