Monday, December 03, 2012

Safer Workplace

A government inspector, from the "Office of Occupational Health & Safety" made a visit to the Wayside Tavern.

He was there to inspect an area in the back of house that had "been reported" as having an "unsafe" method of climbing into a loft.

The inspector assessed the ladder used to get to the loft and as it was simply a common step-ladder, declared it "unsafe".

The inspector issued a requisition that a new ladder be installed, this one to have "bannister rails" (would you believe?), and that the employer was to write up a formal "ladder climbing procedure" (to be signed by any/all staff before they climed this ladder).

Included in the procedure was to be the requirement that any person climbing this ladder must at all times maintain 4 (four) points of contact with the ladder.

.... Anyone wondering why the new state government is going to fire 20,000 public servants, will have part of the answer by reading the above.

8 comments:

mojo said...

Four? Not three, or two, but FOUR?

"Madness! MADNESS!"
-- The Bridge on the River Kwai

Anonymous said...

Four? How do you even do that? After a knee surgery I learned to maintain three points of contact while stair climbing, but four? Wow.

Australia must be a fantastical land. How long have the extra limbs been operative? Do you run extra fast with the three legs, or work extra hard with the third arm, or is that four-point-contact achieved via some process far beyond my limited scope of imagination?

I haven't been as intrigued by Aussie information since I learned of the existence of the Dreaded Drop Bear.

Michael Baker said...

It must take quantum mechanics for that to occur.

If a bloke is in a box, on a ladder, and there is a sensor that cracks open a jar of cyanide if less than 4 points of contact are maintained, is the bloke dead or alive?

#SchroedingersLadder

missred said...

idiocracy

RebeccaH said...

Years ago, I saw a poster, purportedly issued by our own OSHA (Occupational Safety and Health Administration), of a race horse and jockey, both loaded with maximum gear to ensure safety, and the whole horse surrounded by a net mounted on wheels.

This is what western civilization has become.

kae said...

Easy.

Grips ladder with teeth when lifting foot or hand...

Anonymous said...

An old Rolf Harris tune came to my mind:

I'm Jake the Peg, deedle eedle eedle um ...

thefrollickingmole said...

The correct answer to the "4 point contact" is...

"Well when your hung like me"....