Friday, April 05, 2013


At 4.18 pm Australian Eastern Standard Time, on Thursday 4-4-2013 Mine Host telephones to an office in NSW.

The call is answered by a recorded message:  "Thank you for phoning X-corp, our office hours are 9am to 5pm, Australian Eastern Standard Time, please call back during these hours."

Mine Host checks the time, then tries again.  Same result, time after time.

The following morning, the number is phoned again.  Mine Host is put through to a director of the company (a significant sized operation, they employ more than 200 people, mostly in office work).

Mine Host mentions the surreal event of phoning between 9-5 eastern standard time, and being continuously met with a recording stating the the office closed at 5pm.

Specifically it is pointed out to the director of X-corp that Mine Host was phoning at 4.18pm Queensland time, (the state of Queensland uses Australian Eastern Standard Time - New South Wales vacillates between standard time and daylight saving time).

The X-corp director acts as if Mine Host has hydrophobia or something, patiently explaining that Queensland does not having daylight saving, whereas NSW does, and this is why 4.18pm in Qld is 5.18pm in NSW, thus 4.18pm in Qld is ..... (etc.etc.etc..... y'all've got the picture by now)

Mine Host rather succinctly points out that he is well aware that NSW occassionally switches from Standard Time to "Brokeback Mountain Time", however the matter at hand is that X-corp is answering the phone with a recording that is somewhat embarrassing to X-corp.

.... Yep, these self-centred dickheads believe that whatever time NSW decides to set the clocks to, is Eastern Standard Time.

Such delusion is not an uncommon one in NSW.

Thursday, April 04, 2013

Bring 'em on!

In the really big smoke on business, and feeling the pangs of morning hunger, Mine Host happens upon a coffee-shop sorta place selling Max Brenner chocolate (by the cup).

Max Brenner chocolate, for those who've just arrived from Mars, is apparently the name of a chain of shops that sell hot chocolate or something, and serve it in a cup to patrons seated at a table.

Hmm.. ok.. us yokels never see this sort of thing.  Our cultural assimilation used to be obtained by reading the Women's Weekly, but in these more modern times it is the online news that ensures we are kept up to date on the antics of our big city co-citizens.

Individual franchises of the Max Brenner chain are from time-to-time targeted for blockades/pickets and chanting demonstrations by bigoted hippes & others who never work/wash/etc for the apparent crime of having an owner that is Jewish (or somesuch).

Thrilled at having found one of these joints, Mine Host looks around eagerly, hoping for some unwashed bigot to confront him and chant "jew-lover" (or something) in his face.  (In such circumstance it is likely the hippie would next speak when the cranio-facial surgeon removed the wire braces.)

Alas, there was to be no "knuckle-on-hippie" action for Mine Host on that morning.  All one could see were disinterested office workers & delivery boys going about their daily business.


Gazing uncomprehendingly at the menu by the door, Mine Host was eventually assisted by a giggle-pot of a waitress, who seemed to be unaware of Max Brenner's reputation among the intolerant class, and oblivious to Mine Host's urge to punch a protestor on the nose.

The choclate Mine Host is unable to comment on, for despite being ordered it was never served to him.

The breakfast was indisputably the worst Mine Host has paid for in his life.  The staff were shocked at being told so, and deflated when given a comprehensive critique on why this was so.  They offered to not charge for the chocolate...

....Mine Host then said something about how them not charging him for something that wasn't provided is a natural expectation of his, not a favour for them to bestow.

Summary:  Being as how they can't provide hot chocolate (and the food 5th rate and tasteless), and Mine Host didn't get to exercise himself by having fun rendering hippies unconscious, Max Brenner isn't worth going back to.